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Boggs the hero as men's 2's secure 3 points in war of attrition

14 October 2017, 13:30, Banbury Road North (Near)

Men's 2s 2 - 1 Milton Keynes Men's 2s

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I was thinking in an idle moment  the other day that we all have a cross to bear but some crosses are heavier than others.

Tom Biggs is my godson -  not many people know that and I generally choose not to broadcast the fact. I don't know what I did to be landed with the responsibility of keeping him on the straight and narrow but I am constantly troubled by this onerous burden. It is like having a particularly painful boil. 

Boggs (junior) - not to be confused with his father Boggs (senior) is basically not a bad lad. He is making his way in the world as a tax adviser and is engaged to a lovely girl - so there are times when I can almost persuade myself he really is perfectly normal. However I'm sure he won't mind me saying he has issues.

For example when in drink he can be very wayward. And he is constantly angry. In fact with the possible exception of Richard Wilsdon behind the wheel of a car he is, without doubt the angriest man I know.

Consider his behaviour this week which I have observed closely not least because he was drafted into the 2's from the 3's because Fearless Phil was drafted into the 1's from the 2's because Pricey had decided to get married on a Saturday in October (which itself raises the question of who in their right mind agrees to getting married on a Saturday in the middle of the hockey season - seriously!!).

I digress - and I've been told not to do that this season so I'll cut to the chase. On Thursday it was Boggs' birthday .He is now 28 - years that is not months (as he behaves). He came to Thursday night training and almost immediately threw his toys out of the pram because , apparently, no one would play with him. As usual he was disproportionately angry.

On Friday Boggs senior and junior were playing golf against two old boys at Southfield with an 8.a.m. tee off time. Because of the traffic they were late and on arrival at the course he was already very obviously raging. Worse was to follow.

Playing with his Dad they were 3 up on the 15th tee thus needing to win one further hole to secure the match. Boggs smacked his tee shot sublimely and planted it in the middle of the green. Staring victory firmly in the face he then hit  his first putt off the green onto the apron and then contrived to lose the hole by four putting. He then subsided into a spectacular and prolonged sulk. I assure you dear reader I am not making this up. Modesty prevents me telling you how the match finished up. Boggs departed in a veritable fug of fury.

So to Saturday and the contest with MK 2's. MK had selected a squad comprising a goalkeeper, 14 defenders and one bloke who occasionally ventured over the halfway line. I kid you not. Their ambitions were decidedly limited. Accordingly the game progressed in reasonably predictable fashion with the chums enjoying the territorial advantage and even managing to take the lead after 15 minutes with a precise Lewis Jowett shot from a short corner strike. Surprisingly going behind didn't provoke the visitors to alter their game plan one jot.

Thereafter the chums continued to boss the midfield but when entering the opposition circle - as they did frequently - struggled to create more than a few reasonable chances none of which were taken. 1-0 continued to be 1-0 at half time and 1-0 until 9 minutes from full time. Then the wheels fell off. MK scored an equaliser courtesy of the Hawks defence waving through 3 MK attackers of whom at least two were clearly lost. With the Hawks defence paralysed with shock at being confronted by so many men in white shirts the ball was comfortably tapped into an open goal.

Two minutes later MK scored again but like the umpire officiating at the Hawks end your correspondent had not appreciated that some seconds earlier Boggs had parted company with his helmet which was an the ground (see picture 23 for the moment expertly captured by the excellent Clive Jones). Hence, bare headed, he had been shouting for some seconds at the official to get his attention. And there was I thinking he was just having one of his characteristic tantrums.However order was restored after a mid pitch conference between the umpires led to the "goal" award being reversed. I have to say your correspondent assumed the helmet had ended on the ground because Boggs had hurled it there in fury at conceding the first goal. However, subsequently I have learned that the strap on the helmet had apparently broken. On such extraordinary events are points won and lost and leagues decided.

Back to 1-1 and with things getting somewhat heated all over the pitch (Boggs thus being in his element) the chums snatched a winner 2 minutes from time when Dom Bennett finally and calmly smacked a reverse stick shot ALONG THE DECK (are you reading this 2's attackers) into the visitors net.  2-1 to the chums. 3 points - that'll do me.

MOM - Dominic Bennett


DOD- Boggs

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